Two Different Worlds

I woke up this morning with a vivid recollection of another disturbing dream. I was in an…institutional building, much like the high school I attended and other educational facilities I’ve frequented; however, it was much more expansive than any from past experiences. Both the “me” in my dream and the part of me who was observing my dream-self felt as if we were in a nightmarish world where those roaming the halls seemed to be living in a reality other than, but adjacent to, ours. There was nothing unusual about their appearance or their presence in that particular place, but some were behaving in a very disturbing manner. The best way I can describe my feeling-experience in that dream is that it was if I were a teenager having a “bad” day in high school due to what I was witnessing and experiencing. On one hand, I know that it’s not that way every day and that I’ll get to go home at the usual time. But on the other, it’s shockingly clear that many who I thought were…just like me are demonstrating that they are not. Their values and mine are patently different, even though our worlds have intersected within the confines of the same structural institution.

As I opened my eyes this morning, I had a nervous feeling in my stomach, but it began to ebb as I realized that it was just a dream. Yet, as the morning progressed, I also came to realize that many of my dreamworld experiences were mirroring my waking reality. It’s becoming clear that no matter the scale, we are living in two different worlds. I see it locally, nationally, and globally. I see it with those I know, both within our families and among our friends. Communities—whether determined by locality, culture, religion, age, gender identity, political ideologies, or occupation—seem to be seeing the world through two different sets of lenses. Of course, depending on the topic, perspectives vary from person to person and change over the course of time. As we gain more knowledge and wisdom, what we believe changes and, hopefully, expands our understanding of the world and our compassion for others. What I believe is true for me is constantly changing—very subtly at times and, other times, dramatically so. As I recently commented to a friend, life IS constant change.

Over the course of my ever-changing life, it’s become clear that what I value determines my choices. As what I value changes, so do my circumstances. My particular personality has predisposed me to have an ever-widening circle of friends—one of the many blessings that I’ve had. But some of my strengths have also been my areas of weakness. I embrace those I meet not only for our similarities, but also for our differences. If I only want to “hang out” with those who are just like me, it would be best to simply live my life as a monk. And that’s never been what I’ve wanted! I’ve never found it desirable to only have friends who share the same beliefs, opinions, interests, etc., that I do. Diversity is key to living an interesting life—something to which I aspire—and that is why I’ve continued to value a diverse group of friends during every stage of my existence. At the same time, my values in regard to friendships have changed as I’ve grown. An old saying, which states that friends come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime, is one that I’ve always felt to be true. My error, at times, has been in not recognizing that as my values change, the category that a friend currently occupies can also change. One of my strengths—a fierce loyalty to those I love—can become a weakness when I fail to let go of those who no longer share intrinsic values necessary for a healthy relationship. A few examples of a difference in values that would preclude the possibility of friendship with me are those who exhibit cruelty or are often unkind, untruthful, or abusive. And if you’re wondering what this has to do with the topic at hand, let me tie it together for you….

Those who occupy one of the two different worlds that I’m now experiencing—and that includes people whom I consider friends—hold values that differ from my own in such a dramatic way that it’s time to make some hard choices that I’ve avoided in the past. Having had a tendency all my life to walk a tightrope—and happily so—between groups of friends and beliefs that would not mesh well if sharing the same space, I realize that these two different worlds are making the choice FOR me. One season is about to end, and a new one is about to begin, just as my own vision for the future is coming into focus. It’s time to embrace letting go of thoughts, people, and ideas that no longer align with my core values—trusting that those in the tribe to which I belong will make themselves known. I’ve never written a poem with any thought as to whom it might please, nor have I consciously…interfered with any words coming through me that produce my Messages From The StillPoint Within or other writing that has (mostly) remained in my private files. I trust that my work of the past eleven years as well as that from here on in will find its audience. In the meantime, I will embrace whoever resonates with me as a friend just as those who resonate with my work will embrace it. Though the intersecting two different worlds are clearly divided right now, each of us will end up where we belong. And I suspect that, in time, each of these two worlds will find its own plane of existence.